Things you would never hear Rambo Say

[raphmaster23]

-[Rambo sits on his couch and the phone rings. He answers, and Col. Trautman is on the phone.]-
Col. Trautman: Yo man. Whatcha doin'?
Rambo: Watchin' the game. Killin' some Guerillas
Col. Trautman: True. True.
Sarah (through the peephole): Can I borrow some sugar?
Col. Trautman: Who's that?
Rambo: Yo Sarah! Pickup the phone!
-[Sarah picks up]-
Col. Trautman: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!
Sarah: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!
Rambo: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP! YO Teasle! PICK UP THE PHONE!
-[Teasle picks up]-
Col. Trautman: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!
Sarah: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!
Teasle: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!
Rambo: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!
-[Sarah and Teasle put the phone down.]-
Rambo: So what about you? What're you doing?
Col. Trautman: Watchin' the game. Mumblin' some stuff.
Rambo: True... True...
Snake Village Owner: Is that Rambo? Ask him if I can get that python yet.
Rambo: Who's that?
Col. Trautman: Yo Snake Village Owner! Pick up the phone!
-[He does so]-
Rambo: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!
Snake Village Owner: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!
Col. Trautman: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP! YO School Boy! PICK UP THE PHONE!
-[School Boy does so]-
Rambo: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!
Snake Village Owner: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!
School Boy: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!
Col. Trautman: WAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!



my whole point of this thread is for humor. since im sorta a goofball. just want to hear the funny things you guys come up with.

[Raven]

"Pass the cucumber sandwhiches?"

[raphmaster23]

um heres another one.

rambos sitting reading the paper and the phone rings.
Rambo: Hello?
Trautman: Rambo its me Col. Trautman.
Rambo: Hello sir.
Trautman: I just wanted to express my thanks for getting me out of trouble all those years ago.
Rambo: No Problem sir.
Trautman: Just wanted to sing you this song for my appreciation.
Rambo: Ok.
Trautman: You are my honey bunch, sugerplum, pumpumpyumkin, your my sweetie pie.
You're my Cuppycake, Gumdrop, Snoogums-Boogums, You're the Apple of my Eye
Rambo:....
Trautman: Johnny you there?
Rambo:...
Trautman:Talk to me Johnny.
Rambo: Sir...
Trautman: yes?
Rambo: Please dont call me again


i dont know it sounded better in my head.
thanks to the Cuppy cake song

[Saynt Jaymz]

Lol, those were pretty good.

How about,

RAMBO: "Sir, can you be honest with me?"
TRAUTMAN: "Yes, John. What is it?"
RAMBO: "Do these cargo pants make my butt look big?"

[raphmaster23]

YESS Keep them coming!!!

[Jay Rambo]

RAMBO: I'm depressed.
TRAUTMAN: Again! What the hell, Johnny...
RAMBO: I'm seriously depressed now.
TRAUTMAN: What's going on, Johnny?
RAMBO: You talk shit. You said me I was a war machine, the best of my kind. It's FALSE! You are just a douchebag.
TRAUTMAN: Fuck you, Johnny! It's TRUE! You're the best fucking soldier of all the time! I trained you, sucker!
RAMBO: BULLSHIT! MATRIX kicked my ass last night! You're a fucking liar!
TRAUTMAN: Who is this faggot? Must be another pissant soldier!
RAMBO: It's JOHN MATRIX, dumb-ass! He's a Colonel like you, retarded asshole! He's the best fucking war machine I've seen in my whole shitty life! He pissed on me last night!
TRAUTMAN: FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! Beat the crap out of him, it's an order, RAMBO!
RAMBO: You fucking liar! I'm scared! You fag, I can't do that!
TRAUTMAN: FUCK! DO IT... NOW!
RAMBO: Fuck yourself, cocksucker, he's stronger than me! Stronger than me! STRONGER THAN ME! STRONGER TH...
TRAUTMAN: FUCK YOU JOHNNY! FUCK! FUCK YOU! DO IT! DO IT! DO IT NOOOOW!
RAMBO: NOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooo

*BANG* The alternative ending of 'FIRST BLOOD'.